Answered Prayer?
Does God only answer the prayers of the believer?
Some would say scripture supports that only the prayers of the believer can and will be heard by God, other than the prayer of salvation of the non-believer.
Psalm 66:18 says, “If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened”. Isaiah 1:15 says, “When you spread out your hands in prayer, I will hide my eyes from you; even if you offer many prayers, I will not listen.” And Proverbs 28:9 has, “If anyone turns a deaf ear to the law, even his prayers are detestable.”
These scriptures might support that but can’t a believer also fit here? Can a believer “…cherish sin in his heart”? or “…turn a deaf ear to the law”? I have, and I don’t question my salvation, I know in my heart that Jesus Christ died for my sins as well as the sins of all man, even the ones that choose never to believe in Him. The difference is where that salvation will take me and where that missing salvation will take them. But, that’s another discussion. Let’s get back to prayer?
Now, I’m not talking about prosperity prayers or prayers that are self centered in nature. I don’t believe those are answered for anyone if it is outside God’s plan. I’m talking about righteous prayer that is in line with God’s will.
Long, before I was a believer I prayed for the safety of my wife and unborn daughter through a difficult child-birth. My daughter is now 18 years old, healthy and a faithful servant of Christ. Wait a minute, I’ve only been saved 4 1/2 years?!? But, isn’t that an answered prayer? I also added in “I’ll straighten up and change my ways…” Some would say I’ve done that and some would say that is an answered prayer for them too but that event occurred 14 years later. All in God’s timing not man’s, maybe? If, God had not answered that prayer, if Jenni or Marissa or both had not made it through would that have driven me further from God? Was this a coincidence or was this the starting point of a belief that would eventually emerge in my life. There were other times I prayed. I prayed for a safe return from The Gulf War. I made it home, some didn’t. That was even two years before that prayer for Jenni and Marissa. If I hadn’t prayed for that safe return or if God had ignored that prayer because I didn’t believe, where would I be? Where would Jenni be? Would Marissa be?Again, as far as we can tell, these prayers appear to line up with God’s will. You could say the prayer for a safe return was a selfish one but I had a wife, who would become an amazing sister in Christ, to return to. And a, yet to be conceived, daughter that is now turning into that same kind of woman. That is now an answered prayer of mine, albeit after the fact of my salvation.
Muscles don’t just appear one day. We have to build them. How can we build our faith muscles if we don’t excercise them? And how can we reach the strength to take that first huge step and ask for God’s forgiveness if we don’t exercise a little first? I’m not saying that’s all it takes but it’s a flex in the right direction.
God saved me from what I had turned my life into. I know that is an answered prayer of my wife’s. But, God gave me the life I was ruining. Maybe that initial life was an answer to someone else’s prayer. Where they a believer? Will they be someday because of that first step 40 some years ago?
What say you? Is prayer a private club only for the members that “said the oath” or is more than that? I would love to hear your thoughts.
Permission to Speak Freely
I just finished my review copy of “Permission to Speak Freely” by Anne Jackson. This book was birthed from a simple question posed on her blog FlowerDust.net a few years ago. “What is one thing you feel you can’t say in the church?”
With that one question Anne put a crack in a dam of sin and confessions flooded in from all corners of the world. “Permission to Speak Freely” has not only allowed a venue for these individuals to confess sin but it has uncovered how the church we have created has helped to create, perpetuate or hide these sins. I say the church we have created because I believe it is not the Church Jesus had in mind for us.
Through the stories in this book and the ones that continue to appear at Permissiontospeakfreely.com we see a church that is not always built on the love that Jesus teaches but one of ritualism, legalism and even of hate. I’m not speaking of one individual church but of the global church as a whole. I believe this church could align with the Church Christ had in mind if we as it’s body can just get our act together and start working as one in His light and not based on our own wishes, wants or understandings.
With the bravery and faith shown in confessing her own stories Anne shows how God can use our sin and repentance to reach out and help others with similar struggles. Thank you Anne for your honesty, strength, faith and for cracking this dam and let us all pray that it will continue to weaken and crumble until it is no more.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze.com <http://BookSneeze.com> book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 <http://www.access.gpo.gov/nara/cfr/waisidx_03/16cfr255_03.html> : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Empty Nest
I hate the term “empty nest”. Yesterday we took our daughter, Marissa, to Anderson University for her first year of college. Of course I’ve run through the whole gamut of emotions as I’m sure I will continue to do over the next few weeks, months or maybe years but over-all I’m good. After seeing her face the first time I visited the campus with her and the peace that came over me for her while there I could’t help but be ok with it. I’m secure in the knowledge that that is where God has led her to be.
But “empty nest” implies a loss. While I am currently experiencing an absence of her in our home at the same time I am experiencing a fullness of her in my heart. I’ve heard many people describe this moment as if a piece of you has been removed or of having this hole in your heart. I don’t see it that way though. My daughter was and still is instrumental in the expansion and growth of my heart. If it weren’t for her and my wife and the unconditional love they poured into my life I may never have discovered and better understood the love that Jesus has for us all. I look at it more as my heart is being stretched to a larger capacity (over 86.41 miles to be exact). My love for Marissa is growing stronger and becoming more evident in her (temporary) absence.
I am so proud of her for the faith, strength, courage, discernment and wisdom she has displayed over the past few years. She has become such an amazing young lady. I feel that we have prepared her the best we could but more importantly, I know God has prepared her. So, I may be a little sad but I have no fear for her.
I can’t wait to see what’s next… (I love you Boo)
Everyone Communicates, Few Connect
While I found this book to be relatively easy to read and informational I couldn’t help but to be disappointed. John Maxwell has done a great job of motivating his readers but he seems to have all but abandoned his Christian roots. With his circle of influence he could do such great things for Gods Kingdom but he has chosen to remain silent. As a book on communication I would rate it okay maybe even above average. However, as a book from a Christian author and publisher I would rate it poor. It saddened me to see so many missed opportunities to share Gods word in a relevant and relative way with those that might otherwise pay no attention.
This book can be purchased at www.christianbook.com
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com <http://BookSneeze.com> book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 <http://www.access.gpo.gov/nara/cfr/waisidx_03/16cfr255_03.html> : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Everything HE Has…
Last night I attended a memorial service for Emma Faith Ullery. Emma was born with Trisomy 18 and she only lived for about two hours but God has used her to impact many. The faith displayed by Emma’s parents, Kyle and Corie, was inspiring. They only had a brief time with her but they praised and thanked God for that time. In the service Pastor Rollie mentioned how Kyle’s grandpa talked about how, right now, they were seeing everything God has to offer.
That made me reflect on the amazing gift that God gives us over the span of our life. What usually took years to witness was unfolding before us in the last few days. They experienced the courage and strength to get through this that comes from strong faith, trust and belief in Christ. They experienced the power of prayer as hundreds or more called out to God for those precious moments He blessed them with. They experienced the wonder of life as Emma was born. They experienced the community of family and friends as all gathered around. They experienced love as they held Emma. They experienced death as Emma went home, to be with the One who had created her. They experienced fellowship as their brothers and sisters in Christ gathered around them, lifted them up in prayer and loved them. And finally, they experienced the comfort and calming of a loving God. It was the whole cycle of life in fast forward. Everything our God offers us… we just need to accept it and Him through His son Jesus Christ.
It has been amazing and overwhelming to have experienced this gift all at once. To see it played out so briefly but so powerfully. It takes most of us many years to realize and experience this gift let alone to appreciate it for the blessing it really is and many never reach that point.
Thank you Kyle and Corie for the example of shear faith you have been to us all and thank you LORD for being the awesome God that you are.
For those of you unfamiliar with Trisomy 18 here is a video from another family that experienced it too and a tremendous display of their faith and courage in God.
Step into the Light
A while back I was in someone’s office and I noticed the following verse hanging on the wall… John 8:12 When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”
It made me think about the times during my Christian walk that I’ve experienced periods of darkness. More often than not because I was follow Jesus.
I think that’s why we continue to experience at least spots of darkness at times, because we never completely follow Jesus. Even the strongest believer and straightest follower gets lost along the way at times.
Now, I don’t mean that God is punishing us for not obeying Him but that we are not receiving the blessings we could because we have not been obedient to Him in the first place.
When we step out of the light we are in darkness and the further we stray from the light the darker it gets. It seems so simple yet, sooner or later, one way or another, we always seem get there…
What’s Next…
Last week my daughter, Marissa, graduated from high school. Being a member of the school board, I actually got to hand her the diploma. She was also in the top 10 of her class, received numerous honors, some great scholarships and gave the benediction. What a proud moment it was for me and Jenni. But, I think I tend to be more of a realist when it comes to these types of things. Our kids grow up. It’s an inevitability, we can’t stop it, so why not embrace it for the momentous occasion it is.
While I remember and cherish the memories of her first steps, I celebrate her accomplishments that have now led her to her next steps. She will be going off to Anderson University in August, just days after she turns 18. I am confident that she is ready for it. Through her choices in life, so far, and her faith and beliefs, she has instilled in me a sense of comfort that makes it easier to let her go.
I do hope that I have been able to help her learn and grow over the years. I pray that she has been able to learn from the stupid things she has seen me do, in my life. I have given her the opportunity to learn from my mistakes more often than not. Even though I am the parent, I feel as if I have learned more from her than she has from me, over the years. I think I have a better understanding of unconditional love. I have grown closer to God by better understanding the sacrifice He made for us in His own Son. Not necessarily the why, but a better understanding of the love He has for man to have given His Son’s life for our own. While I would lay down my life for her, I cannot fathom seeing her hurt for others.
While I want Marissa to experience only good things in life I know that is not realistic so I pray for strength and courage
for her. I pray that she will learn and grow from the right and wrong, the good and bad. But, more importantly I pray for a continued, strong support system of friends and family and the wisdom for her to rely on them.
I anxiously await whatever comes next in her life. I joke with her a lot about boyfriends and such but I have been praying for a special man for her for some time now. I pray that he will be a Godly man, a good husband and father. That he will not only provide for her physical and financial needs but for her spiritual needs as well.
I will always have fond memories of her childhood but I am so excited to see how God will work in her life next. I love you Boo.
Call To Duty
As I’m sure it is with many others, Memorial Day brings out a spirit of thanks in me. I thank all of those that have given their time, effort and lives in the service of our country. I too am a veteran. I served in Desert Shield, Desert Storm, and Operation Provide Comfort in 1990-1991.
I’m not sure how other veterans feel about it while they are serving but at the time I did not fully realize what I was a part of. It wasn’t for recognition or fanfare. It wasn’t even for some over-spilling sense of honor and pride. While I had sworn to make it my duty to protect my country, to me I was simply doing my job.
Now don’t get me wrong I’m not trying to down play the honor it is to serve our country. There are few things that rival the feeling one gets from having served this great nation we live in. I have discovered one though. It is serving God.
As I look back at the similarities, I can see a path that has been formed in my life. Whether we accept it or not we were all created to serve. To serve God and to serve others. I see the characteristics of servanthood in so many people, most don’t even realize it in themselves. All jobs no matter what the skill level or education involved ultimately serve someone else. When we work the product created or service provided benefits another. After 35 years of life I came to this realization and the pieces of the puzzle finally came together for me. In June of 2006 I gave my life to Christ. I understand now that much of what I had been looking for and longing for could only be fulfilled with the in service to Him.
To that point I had done many things to serve others. I spent six years serving the people of our country in the U.S. Army. I spent six years as a carpenter building and repairing homes for others. From 1998 to the present I have been a Licensed Massage Therapist, caring for the needs of others. My life was filled with the call to serve others but until 2006 I did not understand the reason behind that call. Until that point I had not realized the biggest part missing from my call to duty was serving God.
I truly believe we all feel this call to some extent. A desire to help others, a yearning to be a part of something that is making a difference in others lives. That, my dear friends, is what a life dedicated to Jesus Christ is really all about. It’s not about rules and regulations, the accumulation of knowledge, the judgment or condemnation of others. It is about serving God and others.
I urge you today to look at the example of others before us. Then, look deep inside yourselves. It’s there, trust me. We are all creations of God and 1 Peter 4:10 says it best “Each of you has been blessed with one of God’s many wonderful gifts to be used in the service of others. So use your gift well.” Through that service you too can better understand God. So, go… find your call to duty.
Plan B by Pete Wilson
Plan B: What do you do when God doesn’t show up the way you thought he would? Did you ever think you had it all worked out? Even for a small time. For just a short portion of your life did you think “this is where I’m supposed to be” or “this is the path to _______”. Did it seem so, totally, clear that the end result was within sight or even within your grasp? Have you had it all come to a screeching halt? Sudden, news of a death in the family, serious health issue, dire financial concerns, devastating relationship problems, all can send the best laid plans careening into the ditch. Have you experienced a Plan B in your life? I have. Ironically enough I experienced a few while reading this book. In his book Plan B, author and pastor, Pete Wilson gives us a look into the lives of others that have experienced Plan B’s. I saw myself reflected in a few of these stories and I saw people I know in the others. If you have experienced what might be considered a Plan B, this book is a great light in the darkness, please read it. If you have not experienced one, get ready because yours is coming and this book may be a great way to prepare for it, read it.
I must warn you though this book may not exactly answer some of your questions. It may not explain why your Plan B happened. However, you may begin to understand that Plan B’s are all part of the “big picture”. It will show you how God can use our Plan B’s to stretch us beyond our current selves. Also, how He can use our Plan B’s to show others what faith in Him can bring. Sometimes we can learn from the Plan B’s of others too. I truly enjoyed Pete’s no-nonsense, almost conversational way of writing. Thank you Pete and God bless. Learn more or purchase the book at http://www.planbbook.com/ Thomas Nelson has provided me with a complimentary advanced copy of this book to review.
FREE BOOK…
No, sorry it’s not that kind of free. It’s Free Book by Brian Tome. When you pull a book from my shelves you can usually tell how much I got out of it by the number of sticky tabs I have placed in the pages. Well, this book is loaded.
I’ve always considered myself a patriot. I have had the privilege to serve our country in the US Army. Through this service I have been had the opportunity to travel to and live in foreign countries and observe life under the rule of different types of government. This has given me an appreciation for the freedoms we have. Unfortunately, I feel we have allowed these freedoms to be distorted and to breed a “me, my, I” type of culture instead of the “HE, HIS, HIM” lives we are called to live. Of course, this attitude has been fed by the enemy of God and has grown into the free-for-all “I know what’s best for me” society we now live in.
In Free Book we explore true freedom. The kind of freedom afforded to one that is all-in with Jesus. One who has submitted to the authority of God. Most of us believe we are free when we are actually held captive by our fears. In 1 Peter 3:14 Peter tells us “But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. ‘Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened.’” Whether it’s taking the next step in your faith walk or simply looking into the claims of this guy they call Jesus, we all have things that keep us from our full potential and therefore keep us from being truly free. These “strongholds” vary in all of us but they all have one thing in common, they keep us from becoming the Spirit-filled free spirit we can all be.
Brian has a very normal and common way of explaining things. This book has opened my eyes more to the freedoms I have been given by our God and how I need to exercise those freedoms to show others the life they can have through Him. 1 John 4:18 says “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” This is what is being offered to each and every one of us, a perfect love from a perfect God. Somewhere to cast our fears and in return receive love… and it’s all free, you just have to accept it.
Thank you Brian, for your time, dedication and obedience to Him in writing this book.
Disclosure of Material Connection:
I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Valuable vs. Expensive
This week I learned a lesson. On one hand it was an expensive lesson. I made decision to commit to something that took me away from a job that could have paid between $300 and $600 for a day. I’m self employed with a daughter getting ready to head to college and a car that is not running at the moment and that money certainly could have come in handy.
The commitment I made was to sing at church. We were putting together an a cappella version of Crazy Train by Ozzy Ozbourne. All the instruments as well as the vocals were to be performed vocally. Don’t ask. It was for a specific message, and at the time seemed likes an interesting and creative idea. Once the parts were figured out they were recorded to mp3 and sent out for those involved to rehearse.
Now, I’m a big Ozzy fan from back in the day so I’m very familiar with his songs and Crazy Train was no exception. As soon as I listened to the recordings and tried to do my part, which was probably the easiest out of the group, the lead vocals, I determined there was a problem. I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t find or keep the right key. I have a slight case of OCD so the other sounds were distracting and confusing. Immediately, I had serious doubts about being able to perform this song this way. I also had doubts about whether it would even work anyway. Whether the audience would get it or even recognize it. I voiced that opinion some but not strongly enough or soon enough to the right people.
The day of group rehearsal and the first day we were supposed to do this song came around, yesterday, and it was quite apparent very early that this was not working. I guess I hoped that once we were all together it would all fall into place and work itself out. That did not happen. So the decision was made to cut the song.
So, here I am with nothing to do and out a decent amount of money. That’s where the valuable lesson comes in though. I tend to have a good sense for what I can and can’t accomplish. So, I don’t tend to stray into uncharted territory unless I know I will succeed. What often appears as confidence is often simply a surety that I can do something. This philosophy has led me to and through many successes and few failures. I do believe whole heartedly that one learns more from their failures than from their successes however I still tend to avoid things that I sense I will fail at. Well, I feel that God had a different plan in this case. This was an embarrassing and expensive lesson but far more valuable than the money lost. I’ve certainly gained some humility and during the time I would have been rehearsing and performing I made some connections with some people that I might not have otherwise made. Thank you Lord, for presenting this lesson and for seeing me through it.
Blue Moon…
…the moon and stars to govern the night; His love endures forever.
-Psalm 136:9
The term “blue moon” generally refers to the second full moon in a month and occurs just once every 2.7 years. The last blue moon to shine on New Year’s Eve was 19 years ago, in 1990.
At that moment in time I found myself utterly alone in a sea of soldiers. It was my second wedding anniversary and I was sitting alone on the shores of the Persian Gulf and my bride was not there to share it with me. In fact, due to my military service, we had only been able to share together, less than 320 days of the last 730 we had been married. But there I sat under the largest brightest view of the moon I had ever and have since seen. I can still see it when I close my eyes and I am still in awe of the beauty of this object that our creator placed there for us to wonder over.
That moon got me through a lot that night and many more. To know that she was safe somewhere under that same moon, being watched over by a loving, caring, gracious God. Even then as a “non-believer” I prayed for her and her safety. I prayed for God to get us through this and bring us back together. He came through on that promise and we are still married after 21 years.
Now, I would be lying if I said it was easy and hard even seems like an understatement at times but He came through on that prayer and so many others over the years. I am still in awe of and ever so grateful for the patience and grace God has instilled in my wife.
Even now there are times when I feel alone in my life but I rest in the comfort that we have a God that watches over each one of us. One that answers our prayers in more ways than we can even imagine. Thank You Lord and thank you Jenni.
Father, I pray for the safety of all people tonight. As we gather to celebrate yet another year You have given us on this earth I ask that You keep us safe and warm in Your love and care. Please Father, bless this New Year and use it to use us to further build Your Kingdom. In Jesus holy name we pray, Amen.
Primal
What would your Christianity look like if it was stripped down to the simplest, rawest, purest faith possible? You would have more, not less. You would have the beginning of a new reformation—in your generation, your church, your own soul. You would have primal Christianity.
This book is an invitation to become part of a reformation movement. It is an invitation to rediscover the compassion, wonder, curiosity, and energy that turned the world upside down two thousand years ago. It is an invitation to be astonished again.
I just finished Primal: A Quest for the Lost Soul of Christianity by Mark Batterson. I was thrilled and challenged by Marks previous books In a Pit With a Lion on a Snowy Day and Wild Goose Chase But I believe he has outdone himself this time or more appropriately God has used Mark in bigger and broader ways through this book.
Primal begins with a descent into some of the history of Christianity where we find the “prime directive” from God through Jesus. The Great Commandment: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” That alone is the most primal piece of knowledge one can obtain from God’s word. With that one commandment in place in your life everything else is, to some degree, inconsequential. Now don’t get me wrong here I’m not saying, nor is Mark saying, the rest is unimportant but this is the prime piece of scripture, without loving God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength the rest won’t get you to far.
So many of us, as believers, today are so caught up in a quest for knowledge and answers that we forget to live out our lives with and for God. We forget that our actions and acts toward others are to be the actions and acts of Jesus Himself. We need to be totally sold out for Him. It is so easy to get caught up in the trappings and busyness of “life” and forget that without Christ we cannot truly have life. We are only waiting around to die.
It is my hope and prayer that you would open your heart and mind to Primal and allow God to speak to you through this book as He has to me.
This book is available from Random House Publishers here.
Author
The author of Wild Goose Chase and In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day, Mark Batterson serves as lead pastor of National Community Church in Washington, D.C. One church with nine services in five locations, NCC is focused on reaching emerging generations and meets in movie theaters at metro stops throughout the D.C. area. Mark has two Masters degrees from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School in Chicago. He and his wife, Lora, live on Capitol Hill with their three children. www.markbatterson.com
Praise God…
Today I had the honor to witness the most amazing Baptism I have ever seen. I saw and heard from a man that spent most of his 40+ years attending church but never really understanding who Jesus was and what He really was to us all. Well, recent events in this mans life brought him to his knees and to the foot of the cross. Today, we spent some time in worship to God and then listened to his story. Then we saw this man baptized. It was such an awesome thing to experience. He describes his experience as having being given a new pair of glasses. He says he sees things so much more clearly now and is begining to understand the love of Christ, and it’s obvious. It’s so beautiful to see Christ working in this mans life and to already see God’s plans for him start to unfold.
Thank you my brother for allowing me to be a part of this special occasion. Hang in there, God bless and don’t forget your glasses.
Love & Respect by Emerson Eggerichs
Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs By Emerson Eggerichs.
This book is based upon the message God has given us through Paul in Ephesians 5:33. Through this and extensive biblical and psychological research, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs reveals the power of unconditional love and unconditional respect and how husbands and wives can reap the benefits of marriage that God intended.
I must say I was unsure of what to epect when this book first arrived. Before long I was deeply engrossed and totally enthralled by this often over-looked and misunderstood area of relationships. This book can and has saved marriages. It also has the potential to make good marriages great. More imortantly though is the spiritual growth you can experience in your obedience to God in the practices set forth in Ephesians 5:33. This book stretched me beyond a capacity I was aware I had and has convicted me to work harder at being a better husband to my wife and a better example of a husband for my daughter. I have already passed this book onto my wife in the hope of growing closer not only to her but to God along side her. I have had the opportunity to used much of the material in counseling others. I also lead a small group and can’t wait to introduce this material in an upcoming study. I would highly recommend this book to any and all.
Stray Affections
Book review post by Jenni Phillips
Stray Affections by Charlene Ann Baumbich is a unique book in that it combines the love of animals, love of family and friends, and love of God in one intertwining story. It has three unique perspectives from two adult women who have been best friends since childhood and one of their mothers. It was a very compelling story and kept my interest throughout the book. There were some elements of surprise and mystery piquing your desire to try and figure out what would happen next. Because of this, it was a very hard book to put down. I would highly recommend this novel to someone who is looking for a quick read, but also one that shows how feelings can be misconstrued and misinterpreted, but that above all forgiveness and love for one another can triumph through Him. You can view a video about the book here. You may purchase this book by visiting here.
Author Bio:
Charlene Ann Baumbich is a popular author and speaker and an award-winning journalist. In addition to her Dearest Dorothy series of novels, she has written seven nonfiction books of humor and inspiration. A bungee-jumping, once motorcycle-owning grandma and unabashed dog lover, Charlene lives with her husband and rescued dog Kornflake in Glen Ellyn, Illinois. She loves telling stories, laughing whenever possible, and considers herself a Wild Child of God.
You tell ‘em Pete!!
The following is a post from Pete Wilson. I’ve been reading his blog for a while now and I tend to agree with his point of view. This time is certianly no exception. Thank you Pete for your honesty and attitude concerning a very difficult but real problem in this world today.
Porn Is To Him What A Pedicure Is To Her?
I’ve read a lot of stupid things in my life but this has to be one of the stupidest, most ignorant, completely unfounded statements I’ve ever read (just ask me and I’ll tell you what I really think). While Ian Kerner, Ph.D. is probably a great guy (and I mean no personal offense towards him) I’ve got to TOTALLY disagree with him on the following statement he made during an interview for an article on the Today Show blog. He said…
For many guys porn is basically a 30-second spa day, complete with happy ending: It feels good, relieves stress and functions as a quick little treat — kind of like scarfing down a bag of Gummi Bears in the middle of the day. It doesn’t mean we’re not interested in having “a real meal” with the woman we love, but sometimes we’re in the mood for a snack.
He went on to describe pornography as a harmless distraction that really doesn’t impact an individual or their relationships with others.
Are you freaking kidding me?
When I read this I knew I had to speak to this because nothing could be further from the truth. I’ve met with countless individuals and couples over the years whose lives and relationships have been severely impacted by pornography.
- 42 percent of surveyed adults indicated that their partner’s use of pornography made them feel insecure. Marriage Related Research, Mark A. Yarhouse, Psy.D. Christian Counseling Today, 2004 Vol. 12 No. 1.
- 41 percent of surveyed adults admitted they felt less attractive due to their partner’s pornography use. Marriage Related Research, Mark A. Yarhouse, Psy.D. Christian Counseling Today, 2004 Vol. 12 No. 1.
- 47% percent of families said pornography is a problem in their home. Focus on the Family Poll, October 1, 2003.
I’m not here to try to pile on the guilt. Lord knows if you’re addicted to pornography you don’t need anymore guilt.
I just want to remind you of the truth which is porn is not a “30 second spa day” but a powerful cycle of addiction that can and will destroy your ability to enjoy intimacy with your partner in the way God intended.
I want to remind you that you don’t have to continue to allow your mind and soul to be poisoned by this stuff. You can find freedom from the cycle of guilt and shame you’re caught in!
One of the wisest things I’ve ever done is installed Covenant Eyes on my computer and established a system for accountability in this area of my life and I want to encourage you to do the same. If you have computers in your home and or work which don’t have some kind of filter on them I think you’re just asking for trouble.
Okay (deep breath), I’m stepping down off my soapbox. I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic and while I don’t usually condone anonymous comments feel free to leave them on this particular topic.
Because I Said So…
So, the other day we’re getting ready for church and my daughter yells down from upstairs “can I wear sweatpants to church?” to which my wife immediately responds “NO!” Now, we do attend one of those come-as-you-are jeans and t-shirt kind of churches but apparently my wife draws the line at sweatpants. My 16 year old daughter did not rebel or scoff in the least but responded with a simple ok. “Because I said so” was a perfectly acceptable answer to her.
Now, wearing sweatpants to church may not seem like a big deal to some and it may seem sacreligious to others. That’s not the point here. This whole exchange got me thinking about Gods Word and His commands for us. I’ve heard a lot of people question Gods motives or answers. Why can’t I have sex outside of marriage? Why can’t I take things that aren’t mine? Why can’t I kill that guy that cut me off in traffic this morning?
While the answers to these questions may vary some, ultimately the only answer we really need to know is “because I (God) said so!” God loves us and had our best interest and safety in mind when He gave out the commandments and other life instructions as told by Jesus. But for some reason we feel that we need to question His answers. What kind of world would it be if we could still be like children and accept the old “because I said so” answer? I think this may be what Jesus was talking about in Matthew 18:3 when He said “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” We must leave behind our defiant, diobedient behaivour and become like trusting, obedient, innocent little children, because our Father knows and wants what’s best for us. If we don’t, do we truly have that so important relationship with Jesus???
(for those who may have read a different version of this yes, I did a rewrite. It’s not about the sweatpants. I’ll write on that one later.)
Why Twitter?
Over the last year or so I’ve caught a little flack from my family and friends about my using Twitter (one less since I got my wife @jenniphillips hooked on it). I was going to write about why I liked and used Twitter but then I saw a blog by Michael Hyatt, CEO of Thomas Nelson Inc. and I figure “hey he hit the nail on te head! I’ll just repost it. You can follow him on Twitter here @michaelhyatt. You can follow me on Twitter here @rickphillips.
Don’t know what Twittering is? Read my original post on this topic. If you want to know how to get started, read my Beginner’s Guide to Twitter.>
If you are wondering why in the world you should consider it, here are twelve reasons:
- It will enable you to experience social networking first-hand. One of my pet peeves is people who pontificate on new technologies but have never actually used them. This is particularly annoying—but common—among CEOs. Real users can always tell the difference. There is no substitute for personal experience.
- It will make you a better writer. Twitter only allows you to post 140 characters at a time. As a result, you are forced to be concise. In my opinion, this is one of the hallmarks of good writing. Short messages. Short paragraphs. Short sentences.
- It will help you stay connected to people you care about. This is one of the few technologies I’ve found that actually contributes to community-building. In today’s busy world, it’s difficult to keep up with others. Twitter makes it easy—and fun.
- It will help you see a new side of your friends. In an odd sort of way, Twitter “humanizes” people and provides a context for better understanding them. If you follow me on Twitter, for example, you’ll quickly see that I get excited, bored, frustrated, and confused—sometimes all in the same day. You’ll also learn what is important to me and what drives me crazy.
- It will introduce you to new friends. I have now met several new people via Twitter. These have contributed to my life in small but significant ways. Gail and I have even had dinner with a couple that we met via Twitter.
- It is faster than text-messaging. In a sense Twitter is a universal text messaging system. You can broadcast to all of your “followers” (i.e., people who subscribe to your Twitter feed) or send a direct message to just one. As a result, I have almost completely stopped text messaging. The only time I use it is to reply to someone who messages me outside of Twitter.
- It will make you think about your life. As you answer the question, “What am I doing?” you start to see your life through the lens of the people following you. Interestingly, it has made me more intentional and thoughtful about my life.
- It will help you keep up with what people are talking about. Via Twitter, I have learned about hot books, cool software, breaking news, and even great restaurants. Because the information is coming from real people who care enough to Twitter about it, I have found it more valuable and authentic.
- It can create traffic for your blog or Website. I have noticed a 30% uptick in my blog traffic in the last 30 days. It may be related to the fact that I have been in the news more or have been writing on more controversial posts. However, I also think it is related to the fact that I am Twittering every time I post a new blog entry. This seems to have a viral effect.
- It requires a very small investment. Twitter itself is a free service. In terms of my time, I probably invest less than 20 minutes a day. Since “tweets” (i.e., posts) are limited to 140 charters or less, you can scan them in a second or two. Writing them usually takes less than 30 seconds.
- It can help build your personal “brand.” When people hear your name, what comes to mind? What is your reputation? What is the “brand promise”? Brands are built incrementally, one interaction at a time. Twitter gives you one more way to build your brand, one tweet at a time.
- It is fun! Twitter is just plain entertaining. Following your family and friends is kind of like watching reality TV. The difference is that you know the people and actually care about them. In this sense, it is even more fun, because you know more about the people from other contexts. Don’t believe me? Give it a try.
I’m sure there are some downsides to Twitter that I am either ignoring or don’t recognize. But I would rather jump into the fray and shape the future of social networks rather than sit on the sidelines and throw stones.
Rick and Bubba’s Guide to the Almost Perfect Marriage
“Rick and Bubba’s Guide to the Almost Perfect Marriage” is a look at the ups and downs of marriage. I’ve never heard the radio show of Rick and Bubba so I’m not sure how it compares with this book but I have to say I was not very entertained by it. While I can appreciate the attempt it just didn’t work for me. Maybe it was just the translation from radio show to book or maybe it was the fact that the material was based on the too often clique complaints/jokes about husbands and wives but unless you are avid fans of theirs I wouldn’t really recommend this one. I tend to have what I would consider an above average sense of humor but I really didn’t find this book very amusing. Sorry guys, better luck next time.
Even the Little Things Matter to God…
Last month Jenni and I took a vacation to Tampa, FL. We stayed in a great condo on Treasure Island. We did a lot of nothing and just had a wonderful time doing it. We rested and reconnected with each other and with the Lord.
We walked the beaches a lot while we were there. We saw lots of small shells. I did some snorkeling and found a lot of larger shells and sand dollars. There was one thing I looked for though and never found. I’m not sure why but I just thought it would be neat to find a sharks tooth. I looked and looked and looked but never did find one. I even saw a guy catch a small shark along the shore but no sharks tooth for me. I wasn’t overly upset by this and pretty much forgot about as we packed up to return home.
We got home on a Tuesday evening and I went back to work on Wednesday. I was attempting to get the sand out of my brain since my mind was still on the beach. I was preparing for my day and walking around my office. As some of you may know I tend to dress rather casual at work. I had on a pair of slip-ons that I had worn while in Florida though not that much. I was still thanking God for the blessing of such a wonderful time. Suddenly I felt a stab in the bottom of my foot. I removed my shoe and there stuck in the bottom of my foot was a sharks tooth! It was no bigger
than a rose thorn. I would have never been able to find something that size on the vast beaches we walked. But there it was.
It was such a little thing but it meant so much to me. It was a small gift from God but a huge reminder of this vacation and to remember that I need to occasionally slow down and take time for myself, my wife and my God (not necessarily in that order). Thank You Father.
Show Me the Money…
“All the church ever wants is my money”. How many times have you heard that? I’ve never heard anyone say “all SuperMart wants is my money” or “all the IRS wants is my money”. But that is all they want. All the church wants, hopefully, is for us to be be obedient in our worship to God.
I think since there is generally an immediate exchange of goods or services we don’t think about giving up our money at a store. But this exchange of money from us to the church doesn’t provide an instant or visible return. But there is a huge profit for the store and the church is just trying to keep in operation. The church needs to be able to reach out and provide for those in need. To do this they need money. Pastors and staff are expected to perform certain duties. They need to be compensated for this. We wouldn’t show up to our jobs and perform very well or at all if we weren’t getting paid for it. Why should we expect that from them? They have families and needs to provide for too.
God doesn’t need or even want our money. What He does want is for His people to be obedient, worship Him and care for His house. Do I think some churches are a little too extravagant? Sure. Do they not always spend their money wisely? Sure. But on the other hand we don’t bat an eye at putting too much money into our cars or homes or at the marble columns or ornate glass and steel that decorate our malls. Why shouldn’t we honor our God with a nice place to worship Him?
All we have is given to us by God. The earth, the air, water, food and even our jobs. He has blessed us with everything we have. In thanks for that we are asked to give back. A tithe (10%) is mentioned in the Old Testament numerous times. I think this is a good starting point if you’re comfortable with it. It should probably be your minimum goal as you mature spiritually.
As commissions go 90% is pretty good. Remember it was all His in the first place. He just let us have it. 2 Corinthians 9:7 says: “Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” That’s right, a cheerful giver. That means we should happy and thankful in giving back a portion to God what He gave us. This is simply an act of worship and obedience.
This is actually something I struggled with for a long time and still do occasionally. I didn’t start out giving 10 % but as I experimented with giving more and more God blessed me for my obedience and I learned to trust in Him. Even though I shouldn’t be I’m still amazed when I place Him first in my finances and He always provides more so I can get by.
I Love My Crown
I know we’re supposed to be humble and all but I am so proud to wear my crown. Proverbs 12:4 tells us “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband.” I’ve heard guys say they have the best wife ever but I would have to say they are either mistaken or lying because I have that honor. Jenni and I have been married for just over 20 years now and if you ever needed proof that there is a God and he watches over us and gives us strength she is a testimony to that because I’ve been no picnic.
When Jenni and I first decided to get married she asked me if I believed in God. I grew up not really thinking or talking about God or religion much. The only family member that I knew that had anything to do with that “God stuff” didn’t exactly set a shining example. So, I just kind of didn’t think about it much. Well, when she asked me that question I sorta lied and told her yes. She had been recently saved and it seemed to mean a lot to her and I was in love with her and not losing her meant a lot to me. (hey don’t judge me, she was and is awesome and I knew it)
I think she soon found out that I either lied or had no clue what believing in God meant. But she hung in there. Sometimes by the skin of her teeth and sometimes only by Jesus and her friends holding her up.
I don’t want to paint myself up to be this horrible person or anything but I was not the husband I should have been. Sure, I loved her but my own selfish agenda always seemed to rule out. My life was all about me and she more often than not conceded at least enough to appease me. (And believe me when I say I did some stupid stuff)
But, no matter how bad I sabotaged our marriage or my own life she was there and so was Christ. He showed her how to love me in spite of the pain I caused. He showed her how to shine His light even when I was in the darkest of places. Through the grace that He showed her when she never deserved it she was able to show me that same grace when I certainly didn’t deserve it.
Finally, after over 16 years of prayer and petition and undying love and grace, I opened my thick skull, removed the scales from my eyes and accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and savior.
I still so don’t deserve the blessing that God has given me in my wife but I will proudly wear that crown. Thank You Lord and thank you Jenni. I love you.
Wasabi Gospel
I’d like to tell you about an awesome book I just read by Shawn Wood called Wasabi Gospel. This book will be available for retail sales on July 8th in a “book bomb” at Amazon.com Check it out!
I’m not a big fan of hot or spicy foods like hot wings, Mexican food, Indian food those sorts of things. For one reason they don’t seem to like my body and I can’t get to far from the house after eating them. But another reason is I don’t understand the point of having your lips, mouth, throat, stomach and eventually other body parts burning or even to the point where you can’t even feel them anymore. I just don’t get the appeal. But for some reason the first time I tried Wasabi I loved it. Sure it was a bit scary at first and I only tried a small teeny tiny bit but I soon found that not only did I like the taste, it also agreed with my body.
Jesus saved me a little more than three years ago and over this span of time I have experience many gut punch moments with scripture. I had never made the comparison of wasabi and scriture but being familiar with both I love the idea. To compare the effects of wasabi to the effects of scripture is brilliant in my opinion. I love how wasabi and The Word stimulate your senses, awaken you and gives you the punch that Shawn Wood discribes so well in his new book Wasabi Gospel. For those of you that are unfamiliar with this little unassuming glob of green paste it is typically served with sushi. It seems very innocent and harmless but as Shawn found out it packs quite a punch. Gods word can do the same thing. Shawn does a wonderful job in this book explaining how certain scriptures can seem so innocent and harmless until you get a little taste of them at just the right moment under just the right circumstances and <POW!> right in the gut.
This book may look small but don’t let that fool you. It too packs quite a punch. I highly recommand it one and all. If you believe it delivers affirmation on what you may already have experienced and it convicts you to be bolder in spreading the Gods word. If you’re not a believer or you are confused and have questions this book may help explain what God means in the way He describes and commands certain things in scripture. Again, you can find it HERE at Amazon on July 8th.
You can learn more about the book or Shawn at www.wasabigospel.com or his blog at www.shawnwoodwrites.com or follow him on Twitter at www.twitter.com/shawnwood or friend him on Facebook at www.facebook.com/shawnwood
